Before you buy anything, assess your equipment and the quantity you want to make. The trick is in the equipment--the jalapenos must stand upright during the cooking process or the cream cheese will run out and you'll have a mess. As a substitute for a rack, you can use metal or soaked bamboo skewers. On a grill you may want to line up rows of bricks to suspend the skewers from. In a smoker, you may get lucky and have the right sized pattern to hold the peppers on their skewers. If all else fails, turn a disposable aluminum pan upside-down, cut "X"s with a knife, push down the center of each X and insert a stuffed pepper.

Select domestic jalapenos by size. They have to be large enough to not slip through your rack.

Cut off the tops of the peppers and remove the seeds and veins with a tomato shark or very small melon-baller and finish off with a skinny paring knife. (Chicago Cutlery makes a nice, cheap one.) Even domestic jalapenos have too much heat for most people, so it is important to get the "innards" out.

Make the filling: softened cream cheese seasoned with Old Bay.

Sprinkle insides of jalapenos with salt, insert a smallish cleaned shrimp into each one, pack with filling, top with 1/4 slice of bacon and secure with a toothpick.

Oven cooking is about 45 to 60 minutes at 300F for the bacon to be done.

Smoker cooking is longer, grill cooking shorter, depending on the temperature. The jalapeno needs to be slightly soft to the touch. Best test is to bite one to make sure they are done.

Atomic Buffalo Turds

Source unknown

Great appetizer or side item to use leftover pulled pork.

Ingredients:

Preparation Directions:

Wash and slit the jalapenos lengthwise. Remove seeds and veins (leave veins in if you would like a hotter ABT).

Use left over pulled pork, or prepare a small shoulder (2lb) for this.

Meat variation:

Smoked Italian sausage, smoked chicken or turkey or cooked baby shrimp or flaked canned crab work well.

Cut lengths of bacon strips just long enough to wrap around jalapeno half about twice.

Mix the cheese and meat in a glass bowl.  Fill jalapeno halves with cream cheese/meat stuffing.

Wrap the jalapeno with a piece of bacon. You can hold bacon on top of end of jalapeno and wrap around the middle and come back up over top at other end. Hold bacon ends in place with ½ toothpick each end.

Cooking Directions:

Get cooker at 325F steady. You are wanting to get bacon cooked without burning up the jalapenos. They make special metal racks for cooking stuffed jalapenos, but you can use a wire rack as well.

Place jalapeno rack in covered grill for about 30 - 40 minutes, until the bacon is crisp.

Check them half way through and rearrange as necessary to prevent any hot spots burning any.

Smoking these are even better. Maple wood and Hickory work well.

Special Instructions:

Cream cheese will not melt out unless the jalapeño is tipped over.

After removing from grill let them set for about 10 minutes to let the bacon crisp up. Otherwise eat as soon as you are able to.

Have an ice-cold drink ready.

Here is another way to make ABT:

Deviled Eggs With Crabmeat

Recipe By : David Rosengarten
Serving Size : 8 Preparation Time :
Categories : *Appetizers Eggs

8 hard-boiled eggs
1/2 cup Hellmann's mayonnaise
1 teaspoon Dijon mustard
1/4 teaspoon Worcestershire sauce
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper (or more to taste)
1/4 teaspoon dry sherry
1/2 pound backfin crabmeat*
paprika for garnish

* -- picked over for shells and cartilage

1. Cut the eggs in half lengthwise. Carefully remove the hard yolks from the eggs, making sure not to break the 16 halves of hard-boiled whites that remain. Place the yolks in a mixing bowl.

2. Mash the yolks with a fork. Add the mayonnaise, mustard, Worcestershire sauce, cayenne and sherry. Blend well until the mixture is smooth. Fold in the crabmeat, trying to keep the crab pieces as intact as possible. Season with salt and black pepper to taste.

3. Divide the crabmeat mixture among the 16 halves of hard-boiled egg whites, placing the mixture in the cavity where the yolks used to be. Sprinkle decoratively with paprika and serve.

The following new deviled egg variation, with its alluring chunks of crabmeat, is even more cause for festivity; shellfish is a wonderfully sympathetic flavor in this ensemble. And it's no harder to make!

Yield 16 egg halves



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Cheese Straws

Recipe By : David Rosengarten
Serving Size : 1 Preparation Time :
Categories : *Appetizers Bread

1 3/4 cups flour, all purpose
1/2 cup flour, cake
1 1/2 teaspoons salt
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper -- up to 1/2
1/2 pound cold butter -- small pieces
1 cup cheddar cheese, white aged -- grated
1/2 cup parmesan cheese, good quality -- grated
1/2 cup cheddar cheese, yellow -- grated
--
6 tablespoons ice water -- up to 8

1. In large bowl add the flour, cake flour, salt and cayenne pepper. Mix together.

2. Using your fingers, work the cut-up cold butter into the flour mixture. Do this quickly until the butter is the size of peas.

3. Add the grated white aged cheddar, the grated parmesan and the grated yellow cheddar. Toss mixture.

4. Sprinkle 6 to 8 tablespoons ice water while tossing. Continue adding water until the mixture sticks together, then press it out into a rectangle 10 to 12 inches long by 5 to 6 inches wide.

5. On a floured board, using a rolling pin, roll dough into a solid piece. Fold 1/3 of dough into the center then 1/3 to cover. It might break at this point, but don't worry about it.

6. Turn block so it looks like a book, roll dough again and fold again.

7. Wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate for 30 minutes. After 30 minutes, roll and fold twice more then wrap in plastic and rest in refrigerator for 1 hour.

8. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

9. Roll dough into a rectangle, 8 to 9 inches wide and 1/8 inch thick. With pizza wheel, trim edges (you can bake these for a snack). Cut straws 1/2 inch wide and lay on baking sheet.

10. Bake the straws for 10 minutes or until they're light brown.

A few years ago I came across the cheese straws to beat all cheese straws at a historic inn in Washington, D.C. They were made by Susan Lindeborg, a wonderful chef with a rich Southern heritage. She combines that traditional cheese straw flavor of the South (which unlike the Victorian cheese straw always uses hot red pepper), with what she calls a "rough tough" version of puff pastry. The result is sublime and I'm not just whistling Dixie.